Love in the Facebook Era
Nowadays, most of the mundane and significant moments in our lives are broadcasted simultaneously on our social media networks, whether it be Twitter, Facebook or Instagram. Even though you haven’t seen your friend from elementary or high school, somehow you know what he’s eaten for lunch, what his wife or girlfriend looks like or how fast his baby has grown.
In this era of unfiltered and instantaneous sharing, romantic relationships have naturally been affected by the presence of social networks. In some countries for example, app developers have created social networks such as Between. Described as a “private space for couples”, Between lets the twosome interact with messages, voice mails and photo album, chronicling their relationship timeline in their own little space. Of course, not all couples are discreet like that. How else do we get our lunch time entertainment when couples on our feed get into heated public fights on Facebook?
If companies now base employment on how one conducts himself on social networks, it stands to reason that any potential dates you may have had already scoped out your activities on Twitter/Facebook, and sometimes if they don’t like what they see they may end up not pushing through with the date.
Here are the 10 commandments on how to survive relationships in the age of Facebook.
1. Thou shalt not overly flaunt your brand-new relationship. We all have this friend. The one who suddenly decides to create just one account for her and her new honey. She posts nothing but couple shots, happy selfies and love quotes. We get it, you’re in love. We don’t need a blow by blow account though.
2. Thou shalt not stalk the ex and his new girlfriend. While it’s perfectly human to want to find out what’s going on with your ex since you broke up, it’s not the best idea to make it a daily habit. If you can’t seem to kick the habit of researching him, enlist the help of your friends and keep yourself busy. If you don’t feel like defriending him, hide his posts until you feel like you’ve truly moved on.
3. Thou shalt not proclaim your bitterness to the world. So the two of you broke up and he was a giant jerk about it. It doesn’t mean that you should inform everyone in full detail (with photos) how big a jerk he was. Not only will this make your common friends uncomfortable, it will only make him think he “dodged a bullet” when you go all woman-scorned-hear-me-roar online.
4. Keep your photos SFW (safe for work) or make sure to utilize Facebook’s privacy settings. You don’t want your boyfriend’s mom (or grandma) to see the two of you frolicking on the beach.
5. Thou shalt not flood your friends’ timelines with sap.
6. Going on a blind date? Employ the golden rule by not posting anything on your social networks something that is likely to turn you off if you see it on his.
7. Don’t add his friends and relatives on Facebook unless you’ve already met them or if you’ve been dating for more than three months.
8. Don’t use social media to check up on your significant other and pick a fight with him over it.
9. Nor should you demand he take down photos, messages–any sign of existence of his ex on his social networks. Wouldn’t it be sweeter if he did it all on his own?
10. Don’t demand for him to change his relationship status to “in a relationship.”
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